Retirement: The Professional Woman's Approach vs the Rest of Us

Mt. St Helens blew up...don't let your retirement do that!

I have friends that were professional women all of their adult life. Some took only the minimal time when their children were born and others took some real time off. But all of those women out of necessity or by design went back to work very soon. It was the choice they and their families made.

My world did not go that way. I was a stay at home mom that worked just enough to get us through those time when we needed extra money. My life was what a lot of women see as a lifetime of retirement. Even though I "worked" very hard at the job of life I was not in the workplace with small vacations and very little down time.

Today I was reading a blog post that Kathy over at Smart Living 365 titled Navigating Transitions Before, During or in Retirement. The title lets you know that Kathy has some serious subject matter to cover.

A book she had read prompting her to write a review was called Retirement Transition—An Innovation Approach written by Patricia West Doyle. I thought as I read the article that I could have used something like this when we retired over 20 years ago. Like with the babies we brought home when we were young, there was no instruction manual. Either you figured it out...well you had to figure it out because there was no choice.

I have written several posts about retirement "how-to's" because I am living the life on the sunset side of retirement. You talk about it, I know what you are saying from experience. One that has gotten over 4000 hits is called How to be a Snowbird...answers and lists! Another that has been read to death is The Seven Stages of Retirement Grief. Those articles are for those of us that just didn't know what was going to happen and what to do with our lives when there was no job. We could have used a little retirement transition information.

In her article Kathy talked about doing some self examination. I personally loved the part about achievement. Her thought was that it was accomplishment that filled her with satisfaction. Finishing the job, or for me vacuuming or writing or even a walk around the blog fills me with a sense of satisfaction. Knowing that about myself and getting it down someplace would have been very valuable for me. I now see very clearly that a life without propose is no life at all. Knowing that is very important. Thank you Kathy for just that small part.

But there is so much more. I think you should go over to Smart Living 365 and read what she as to say. All of the blog posts are full of wonderful information and surprises.

Now I wonder...WHAT SURPRISED YOU ABOUT RETIREMENT or LIFE?

b+

How Do You See the Future You?

We dropped in to have a cup of coffee with my daughter and her husband this morning. They had been to a Weight Watchers meeting so of course the conversation turned to what was going on there. My son-in-law told me that the question for the morning was "How do you see your future self?" He said he saw himself as Tom Selleck. I am not sure if that dates him or not but I guess even the old Tom is not bad!

Then he looked at me expectantly. I am almost 74 years old so seeing the future me means something entirely different. I am living my future. The outcome was determined many, many years ago. I am the answer to the how the future will look, not the question.

Our future now...grandchildren, visits with family,
travel, an occasional golf game, long walks,
our garden, friends and a snowbird lifestyle.

I suppose the two things that I thought about when I was younger was money and health if I indeed thought about anything. I was never the primary breadwinner although I did work most of my life. I am a retired teacher. I always saw my role as keeping things under control so we could live on what we had not what we wanted to have. As for my health, I have always been active both mentally and physically so what is, is.

I don't think I am the best example for independent women of today. But I knew women that made some very smart financial choices that left them well fixed in retirement. The thing that always impressed me about those women was their determination to finish what they had begun. They found careers and worked very hard to advance and learn within those parameters. Women my age did not change jobs if they were smart and had a good position. The grass did not appear to be greener to them. Those women retired and could be self-supporting if they needed to be.

Of those women, one stands out in my mind. She was a home economics teacher turned counselor. She earned a Master's Degree when her children were young. Her home was beautiful even though she did not spend very much to make it that way. She was all about creating and doing it herself. Her husband was a wonderful partner. She probably visited the second hand stores and looked for deals. She covered her family room floor with carpet samples and found uses for wallpaper sample books. We are very lucky now because information on DIY is everywhere we look. Doing what she did would be much easier now.

They sold that home making a big profit and built a new one in town after she and her husband retired. I am sure it is as beautiful as her country home. Like me, she is now living the future.

If I were to give advice to a young woman today that is not married and the primary breadwinner, I would tell her that living on what she will retire on and saving the remainder is the answer to providing for their future. The phrase that so many use, "I cannot retire to the lifestyle I am living now," is very telling. The future depends on living in the lifestyle you will always be living. It is all about self-control and seeking help from a professional for working out the details.

One resource I found for retirement planning is this tool from Personal Capital. It's a retirement planner that's 100% free to use for anyone in the U.S, and it really helps you see how much you're saving and when you're planning to retire.

I am very grateful for the way things turned out for us. Would we have done things differently? I don't know. We live a very full life on what we accumulated. Now we are reaping the rewards.

So, how do you see your future?

b+

Note: I received no payment for this article.

Related articles

• How Are Americans Spending Their Retirement?
• Retirement advice when your children retire?
• Aging: Make Mine Beautiful
• 20 Awkward Steps to Our Happy Retirement or There Wasn't a Guidebook
• Talking about Retirement...again!
• What No One Tells You About Retirement

Enjoy Your Retirement...how much help will you need?

English: Suburban serenity.
Years of creative commitment to the gardens
of Garforth result in peaceful havens
where so many pensioners enjoy
their retirement. (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

The holiday season is that time of year when children spend more time with their parents. This is the perfect time for the family to have some conversations regarding the future and how the responsibility involved with caring for each other will evolve. Here is an guest post submitted by a nursing home facility that could be an icebreaker for that delicate subject. I hope it is helpful.

Enjoy Your Retirement

After working long and hard throughout your life, it is great to be able to look forward to enjoying a long and relaxing retirement. Whether you'd like to spend your time surrounded by friends and family, take up a hobby - such as gardening or painting - or just take it easy and see what each day brings, retirement will give you the extra time you need to pursue these things.

Some people, however, might worry that they can't enjoy their retirement to the fullest because they require care. Nowadays there are several good options for you if you’re in need of nursing and other assistance. Getting nursing in your own home is one way to go about it. A qualified nurse can come to your house to look after you and help you out in whatever ways are necessary. That way you can still enjoy your retirement years within your own home while still getting the help you need. You can choose to have as much or as little time with your nurse or nurses as you need, this might be one or two visits a day, or around the clock care.

If you don't feel like having a nurse come to look after you in your place of residence is the right choice for you, you could always think about moving to a nursing home or a retirement home. This way, any nursing costs will be included in the amount you pay to stay in the retirement home, and there will be professionals on staff all throughout the day and night to give you the attention you need. Another bonus about moving to a nursing home is that people in a similar situation to you will surround you so you will make lots of new friends. Most retirement facilities will also organise activities, and even days out, for their residents so there will be lots going on. The nurses in these places will be highly trained and sympathetic to your needs, so that is one less thing to think about.

So, however you want to spend your retirement, you can have lots of fun, regardless of whether or not you also need nursing care. If you decide to go into a nursing home, think about your options. There are plenty of excellent retirement homes in Tyne & Wear (http://www.caringhomes.org/tyne-and-wear/) as well as in other locations around the country, so pick the right one to suit you.

Related articles

• Finances and Brainstorms: Are You Worried enough about Retirement to Make Changes? (retireinstyleblog.com)