Do You Lie About Your Age?

My son and his family left this morning to go back home. They were staying in their condo close-by for a month so we spent a lot of time together. July is the month of a rejoining in our family. For almost 25 years I have been watching 12 grandchildren grow and change.

Meelie, Age 4 or 5

Because we only see his two girls once a year, we notice the growing more noticeably. In my mind I mark the march of time.

This year their youngest child is 8 (almost 9) going on 13 (like her sister). She is tall, physically strong and above all articulate and a great reader. But...she is 8 (almost 9)...not older, not younger, just 8 (almost 9)! Why do I say that even though she looks older?

Well, here is the deal. Her real age is related to her emotional development. She responds and truly acts like an 8 (almost 9) year old. She wants to say she is older but I am not buying it!

We had a big celebration because the oldest, Maddie, turned 13 this year and this is the first time we have ever celebrated a real birthday with her. Birthdays are on my mind.

So when I was sitting at breakfast in a restaurant when someone at a table near me was revealing that it was their birthday I paid attention.

Today is my birthday. I just turned 50,  she said.

Well, another added,  I am not 50 and I am so glad. 

How old are you then? asked the first.

Age 8 (almost 9)

I wouldn't be surprised if that lady didn't want to lie about her age just like Meelie but she didn't. She was quite a lot older than 50.

However, in the end it would not have mattered what the woman said. The answer would have been the same...Oh my goodness, you don't look XX years old!

That one just keeps coming up over and over...you don't look XX years old! 

The person receiving the so called compliment really wants to ask how old they do look. Older? Younger? Shorter? What????

It was at that moment that I began to understand why people, especially women, lie about their age or simply never tell. It is just too hard to have the conversation and like me, no one ever knows what they should say.

I have heard my husband invite people to guess his age...that one came back and bit him and I have never heard him ask again.

See, in the end it doesn't really matter what the number is or how old you look. What does matter is how your emotional development is coming along. It matters what age you are in your mind or in Meelie's case, how long you can sit still!

In the end, we can fool some of the people part of the time but not all of the people all of the time. So, instead of trying to fool them (and ourselves), why not just keep them guessing? I think I am going to try it.

Do you reveal your age?

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Out of the mouths of babes...Amelia-isms

When Meelie comes to stay with us, we know we are in for a treat. She is 7 going on 15, very precocious and easy to be around. Her favorite word is "why" but she know that she has a limited supply when she come in the door. She is careful to use the allowed amount wisely. We love her a big bunch.

I have new sliding drawers in my kitchen cabinets thanks to my wonderful husband. I can slide out the appliance drawer and get the mixer without unloading the whole collection. I was showing it off to 7 year old Meelie and bagging on Grandpa. "Boy," she said, "you are really really lucky!" and grinned from ear to ear. I didn't expect that. She made me realize that I need to count my blessings more.

We were getting up from dining room table and she walked over to a mirror that hangs on the wall. As she began to touch the mirror all over I said, "Meelie, please don't do that. When you touch a mirror, your finger leaves something behind that will make the mirror look dirty after a while." Her response was, "I love you Grandma." Oh my goodness...how can you even be cross with a child that is such a dear.

"Why just exactly are you painting your house?" she asked during a conversation we were having over paint colors as we drove down the road to horse camp. (One "why" gone.) I explained how the value of one of our biggest investments, our house, would drop if we didn't paint the inside and outside. She pondered that for a minute and responded with this reasoned thought. "Yes, Grandma I see that the value drops and your house is not worth as much money but it cost money to paint. Why go to all that work." Oh, my gosh...how does she do that?

So, as we were packing her bag to go home yesterday she leaned over to me and said softly, "I will miss you Grandma." You can see why we love her so much. She is a treasure. All of our grandchildren are. Indeed, we are very, very lucky.

Have a wonderful day.

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Shopping for Shoes with Maddie and Amelia!

Many, many years ago my now 16 year old granddaughter picked out a pair of shoes for me. They were Teva's and I have always loved them because I could wade in the water and it didn't ruin them. Now about 12 years later I went shopping with other granddaughters. I wanted a pair of dancing shoes to wear to our Valentines Day dance.

Seeing things through a child's eyes is a very wonderful thing.

Maddie is 10 and she could see what I needed right away. She found a pair of t-strap shoes, red, large heels and very practical. She thought they were great! I thought they looked like something a person in their 70s (LIKE ME) would wear...I did not like them at all. But I loved that Maddie was thinking of me...sincerely thinking about me. She wanted me to have what I really needed. She is such a wonderful granddaughter.

I hated these even though they are very practical. (dancing shoes)

Amelia, on the other hand, brought out pair after pair of gladiator shoes for me to admire. Even though I am in my 70s and don't want practical shoes, I do know that I would look ridiculous with straps winding up my ankles. But evidently Amelia thinks I am a very cool grandma! I liked that a lot.

There were no shoes purchased. I couldn't do it even to please those two little girls!

Amelia loved these!

Have you ever let your grandchildren help you pick out shoes?

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