Sex is Not for Sissies!

I've been watching The Handmaid's Tale on Hulu. The show is riveting and disturbing. The story is one that circles around a global environmental disaster. The result is a severe drop in pregnancy's and the birth of living children. As a result a group of religious fundamentalist rebels win a fight to set up a totalitarian society where women are property and those women that can bear a child are separated to become the bearer of children for the elite infertile women.

The Reality Check: The story has been on my mind a lot because the reproductive rights of women seem to be on men's mind as much as it has always been on women's.

Only a female can bear a child. Men can't do that.

So what should we tell our daughters and granddaughters? What do they need to think and know as they grow older? This new climate for girls/women is not something to be taken lightly.

• In the USA a group of powerful people are chipping away at the rights that women have to have an abortion.
• Women may lose their access to birth control through their insurance. 
• It is said that women have used abortion to replace birth control. 
• Some think that late term abortion for an endangered mother that will die thus killing the fetus is a sin.
• Even rape victims are at risk in this scenario.

I don't think that there is any light hearted approach to a girl/woman's life. While for many the role is only joyful, for others it can become an unbearable burden.

I have often thought that a woman may have the right to choose but with those rights comes a great deal of responsibility.

That is the way it is with anything that we choose to do. And the right to choose an abortion, for example, is being taken away. The landscape of women's lives is changing radically.

I have heard some pretty harsh ideas on the subject of unwanted pregnancy.  Some are pure rubbish I think. But I don't know. What do you think? For example when a woman or girl is pregnant the thought may be:

• 9 months is not that long. 

• Women simply need to not have sex. Birth control is evil. 

• Babies should be carried full term no matter what.

• A woman or even a girl can endure heartache.

• Women can and should keep all babies regardless of how they became pregnant. After all, women/girls are born for it!

Would you agree with those beliefs?

If so, you then understand that if you are a girl/woman, you may not ever have a choice even if you are raped. It may be a hard cold fact of life. Bad things happen even to very good girls.  

Being born a female is a gift with a price tag and girls should know that there is no easy way out of the role they play. It is simple; girls can have babies after they start their period. That is and can be at a very young age. I know a little girl that started her period at 9. 

I will say it one more time: Bad things can happen to very good girls/women.

My advice to my daughter was "Be careful, know what is going on around you and please stay safe." Now I would say, "Be careful, watch and be careful. While we may be losing our reproductive rights we can still be smart."

Our daughters and granddaughters are growing up in an age where they are going to need to take control of their bodies and their life. And by that I mean they need to control their relationships with the boys/men (even Husbands) in their life. Sex is not for sissies! It is an act with consequences.

I would like to add here that I do think that men could take on some of this load but if birth control is off the table even their hands are tied. What do you think?

The Handmaid's Tale brought all of this home. The total lack of control over our bodies has not yet been taken away. We need to use that right often and decisively.

What is you best advice?

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